Just This Sistahs Opinion

Marriage: Not in My Book

While books reflect our lives and dreams, mostly what I read in black lesbian novels is about love and relationships. To be honest, I really mean sex. Lots and lots of sex.

And don’t get me wrong. There’s nothing wrong with sex. I love it just like the next lesbian (and the next lesbian after that). The act of making love is a beautiful thing, the sensual touching and caressing between two passionate women who have this intense connection that it erupts into a wild explosion of lust…

Damn, what was I talking about?

Oh yes, that I love sex as much as the next lesbian. Sex plays a large role in our relationships, and it most assuredly resounds in the books we read.  If you’ve noticed, Sistahs on the Shelf features more than a few erotica collections or novels with erotic themes, written by incredibly talented women who are good at their craft. They entice us with tales of tantalizing positions and places, one-night stands, sex with love, sex that turns into love and straight-up fucking. If there’s an amorous adventure to be had, it’s in one of those books (case in point Ms. Erotica’s Kiss! Kiss! Keep It Wet! and newcomer Katrina Arango’s Wide Open).

Yet where those books provide a wide array of sexual experiences, one thing I don’t see very often is marriage. There’s plenty of love stories, how two women meet or reconnect and fall in love — and that’s where most of the books end.

I want to read a black lesbian novel that features a couple contemplating or planning to get hitched, or even better, a couple that is joined in marriage or a union and how they make it work.

Yes, I understand that we haven’t gotten to a point of having marriage equality in all states across the country. Yes, I realize that some of the women writing our novels are 20 and 30-somethings who are mirroring their own lives and loves, because it’s always best to write what you know. And I also know that the institution of marriage, even with “straight” counterparts, is not exactly successful or revered (the divorce rate is about 50 percent) .

But this doesn’t stop me from wanting to see marriage or commitment ceremonies in what we read. Because we all need something to aspire to.

Besides, I love a good wedding.

Just This Sistahs Opinion is the brainchild of Rena, Sistahs on the Shelf Founder/Publisher, which will (hopefully) be a weekly column about lesbian literature and life. Reactions to this column? Send them to rena@sistahsontheshelf.com. Email her if you would like to contribute.



3 thoughts on “Just This Sistahs Opinion

  1. Man! I love a book with sex in it! I love reading it, and doing it. I think that books with black lesbians need to explore sex between black women more! I dont like reading a book where only head is given. I like variety in the type of sex in books. But i agree i would love to read a book about a couple planning to get married and the issues with that. But lets not seperate sex, fucking, love making whatever…couples marries or planning to get marries or couples with children need to experience those types of pleasure also.

  2. Pingback: Finding Us by T. Jurrette : Sistahs on the Shelf

  3. Pingback: Finding Us by T. Jurrette | Sistahs on the Shelf

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